Frustration + Tiredness = ?

Further to my tiredness issues.

As I spoke to myself(*) aloud (^) about what I should do as a result of Grad Con on the drive home, I realised that there was an essential, hard-to-come-terms-with application which I must do, which I believe to be the key(^^) to me finally being able to deal with the past and move on. I won't speak further on this past, but I believe it also necessary for me to be able to establish relationships and move further on existing ones. However, the hardness of it now lingers in my mind, and regardless of the fact that for once in my life I know what to do, with startling clarity, it remains a frustrating thorn in my mind. Frustrating because its true. Frustrating because thinking about it is distracting me from work. Frustrating because its taken me this long(**) to figure it out. I now have a headache (could be the prolonged effect of looking at a computer screen, but the current circumstances dismiss it) and the possibility that no-one may be home tonight brings little comfort. The convergence of stressful events seems to be taking a toll, and I'm still not quite sure how I will handle the absence of my sister. I'm glad that I don't have much else to worry about, but right now, I need to rest, and deal with this. Soon.

(*) this in itself is not unusual ...
(^) ... but this is.
(^^) then again, I used to have a saying, "The key is, there is no key"
(**) half my life, or something like that